I spent more than a year of my spare time on this speech. The biggest speaking project I’ve ever done. Now it’s finally online! I don’t want to discuss this topic at work or at home. So only some lucky friends got the treat 🙂
I believe TEDx is a great platform to discuss such topics – nothing is too shocking. Pickup Artist is a very controversial topic, I got some people immediately becoming defensive when I mentioned the words. But, hey, that’s why we need to know more about it. I try to project the positive side of the whole seduction community in this speech. And the learning is for everyone.
Behind the speech, it got some valuable lessons as well.
Why did it take such a long time? I could come up with a quality speech within a day, but this one cost me way too much time.
- It’s hard to find the right angle – I have 50 good lines that I want to mention. The more you get into a topic the less easy to keep it simple.
- People have very different opinions – TEDx organizers often don’t agree with me. Alright! They want the right message in their events! Reasonable, but not always healthy.
- The speech has to be personal and entertaining. The biggest lesson here. The speech “Why I love and hate pickup artists” was less entertaining, and I do see the difference in audience response. Today’s world entertaining goes a long way.
The last minute rejection was an eye-opener!
At the end of 2016, I was about to fly to a TEDx location to give the speech. Just 2.5 days before the event I got an email – you never want to experience this in your lives. My heart sank when I read: due to the reason that my speech does not fit the event they have to decline my application. What? I was accepted and all set. This is going to be a great experience, a success and how could they do this? Yes, they can. And no matter how disrespectful and disgusting it was, they did it.
Looking back, I can understand it was not a total surprise: one organizer had personal opinion on the topic and requested me add his words. No, thanks! I am the speaker. Well, it turned out that this individual was autistic. It was hard to connect to him, and probably hardly anyone could. So, a few sleepless nights, missing impact on the audience and a good story to reflect on.
I feel the journey of my research on romantic relationships is coming to a natural closure. Not that I don’t have more to say, but life moves on. And more exciting topics will come.
So, stay tuned!